Lori's
Song
Good Lori Smith sat in Sunday
School
While her teacher told a story
About a magical place called heaven
That was waiting for Little Lori
The girl sat with eyes wide open and her face lit all aglow
Teacher describing crystal castles lined with streets of gold
Rivers run with soda pop and the mountains are milk chocolate
And rain falls in sweet soft drops until you want to stop it
If you're good you go there when
you die
A place of righteous congregation, high up in the sky
And Lori wanted to see this heaven with all her soul and heart
Teacher said, "Be a good girl, and that would be quite a start."
So she ate her asparagus and
never kissed the boys
Played nice with her sister and gave the poor all of her toys
But she got tired of waiting for God to take her away
"There must," she thought and schemed, "be a quicker way."
First she hailed a taxi and asked
for a ride to heaven
The cabby drove her 'round the block and charged a dollar forty-seven
Next she tried a looking glass, and then a jumbo plane
Dug herself a rabbit hole, and when that didn't work she prayed
"God I love you so much with
everything I am
"I want to see you face to face,
today, if I can."
She climbed up to the windowsill, using the dresser for a step
She fell down to the briar patch, seven floors without a catch
Even as she spiraled down she
felt her body rising
To a place so white and heavenly bright, its glorious light was blinding
And God the Father stood there with all his angels to behold
The little soul that had come at last to be welcomed in the fold
And Lori saw the streets of gold
and a land that knew no time
She ran ahead, laughing gaily, her little arms embracing wide
But before the gates of pearl and grace stood the keeper of the Law
With his massive book and spectacles, and a dark lump wedged in his craw
And Little Lori who found that
she couldn't wait
Had broken heaven's rules, and was turned back at its gate
"Little one, you killed yourself,
and this is what that spells
"Like all the other suicides,
you're going to burn in Hell."
She agonized in afterlife, ripped
in Satan's racks
Left to hang by her nose for hungry rodents to attack
So Sinner Lori Smith, who dreamt of sugarcoated summer dreams
Knows only her just suffering, and a long eternal scream.
