Seriously mannequin, you look like an asshole.  There’s nothing about you that says you’d be at all worth knowing.  First of all, checkered sweater vest with a sport coat.  Go screw yourself, preppy.  You look like a trendy prick that can’t choose what kind of “dress casual” he is this week.  And white pants make you look like eight shades of asshole, ranging from “moderate pink” to “bleeding brown.” 

But worst of all: Chuck Taylors with no socks.  Fuck you.  I can’t wear Chucks anymore because of trendy Brookstone vegan motherfuckers like you.  Never mind that Chucks are awesome and I’ve loved them since I was six…now when I lace up a pair of canvas sneakers I can only think of hating you.

You so fill me with hate, Mannequin.